Why should I bother to be authentic?
Updated: Oct 25, 2020
Some of my friends will always ask me why I’m so hard on myself for being one hundred percent authentic all the time. I often share various scenarios where I haven’t been fully true to myself and discuss what strategies I can potentially undertake, so next time I’m in the same situation I can act differently. And many of the people in my life think I’ve taken the concept of authenticity way too far and I’ve become almost dogmatic about it. They think I bother to be so authentic because long time ago while meditating under a coconut tree in Bali I’ve received the insight to name my company “Sacred Authenticity”, then I’ve labeled myself proudly with those two words and now I hold myself extra accountable for living up to this rigid intention and self-identification. And this couldn’t be further from the truth. “Sacred Authenticity” is not a cheesy badge of honor, it’s nowhere near that artificial.
Authenticity means literally everything to me. And I dare to say that, if you want to ever be truly fulfilled, loved or successful, it must mean everything to you too.
Let me explain. First, I’d like to point out that I’m not coming from the perspective of somebody who spent a lifetime being always one hundred percent authentic, unapologetically herself, not conforming or giving in to social and family pressure. Quite the opposite. I, indeed, spent a big portion of my youth living according to everything but my authentic truth. Therefore, this article is written from the standpoint of somebody who was able to experience and evaluate a very high saturation of adverse side effects of inauthenticity. Even though I was far from being true to myself, I’ve spent the last decade researching all possible traditional and alternative modalities that can help me align with my authenticity with the hope that one day I’ll be where I am at today: honest with myself and others, transparent, liberated and empowered within my authenticity and brave enough to be that self unapologetically. Not only that, but I get to share my knowledge about the subject daily and inspire others to make the necessary choices to live in accordance with their own individual truth, values and identity.
Striving to be authentic has entirely transformed every aspect of my reality and is continuously improving my overall quality of life.
So, again, why should we bother to be authentic in a world that seems like nothing but a masquerade? Well, it’s very simple: If you do not love yourself enough to be yourself, nobody else will. If you don’t love yourself enough to behave in ways that feel good and make you happy, nobody else will ever love you in ways that make you feel better or happier. Our external experiences, including the personal relationships and professional opportunities we manifest, are simply a sheer reflection of the way we treat ourselves, think about ourselves and love or not love ourselves. I’ll break it down even further. I would go so far as to say that, in my opinion, inauthenticity equals self-hate. Period. It really isn’t much more complicated than that. It purely means you carry an incredible amount of shame and guilt for being you, it means you are embarrassed and uncomfortable with yourself and therefore you feel the need to act differently than you normally would. Reading this, you may want to pretend that this isn’t true or doesn’t apply to you personally, because it sounds so harsh and too tough to deal with. Why would anybody feel that way about themselves after all? Nope, not me, doesn’t apply to me. And I wouldn’t be surprised, I’ve heard this so many times.
Every single one of us has a unique blueprint, a sacred combination of potentials, an individual blend of qualities, desires and values. Therefore, by you not honoring your authenticity, you are not honoring your sacredness.
Think about it for a second. If I don’t honor my authenticity and I am not behaving one hundred percent in accordance with how I feel on the inside, I am betraying myself, I am cheating on myself. If I am conforming to something external, I am giving up my power and my sovereignty. Complying to something external involuntarily, or even worse – unconsciously, means I am ashamed of myself, means I hate myself, means I don’t love myself and don’t accept myself too. So, if I go out and behave inauthentic, which in my case would be doing things like wearing makeup or certain types of clothes or drinking alcohol or acting excessively social in order to fit in, please everybody and avoid standing out, I am ultimately betraying my values to get the love and appreciation I am emotionally immature to give myself to begin with.
We are made to stand out. We are made to be individuals and have differences.
Choosing to shift your behavior and identity when being around other people is choosing the other people instead of choosing yourself. It’s showing yourself on a consistent basis that you don’t deserve to be loved by yourself and others. It’s reinforcing the feeling of being unworthy of receiving love and appreciation from anybody. And again, if you don't think you deserve to love yourself enough to be yourself, nobody else will ever think you deserve to be loved, appreciated, listened to and taken into consideration either. Also, when you don’t dare to express your unique identity and authentic voice fiercely, nobody will ever get the chance to see your true colors and fall in love with them anyway. This is why I am advocating for authenticity so diligently and passionately. It’s because the consequences of the opposite are so severe and life disfiguring. Believe me, if you ever want to be seen, appreciated and celebrated for who you are, either in your personal or professional life, if you ever want to be prosperous and fulfilled, if you ever want to be genuinely loved and enjoy a sense of belonging, you must always do your very best to be as authentic as your current awareness allows you to be. You must also always work on developing that awareness further to uncover the parts of your authenticity that are still inert, suppressed or subconscious and are waiting to be accommodated in your life choices and behavior.
Being authentic is choosing yourself and your long-term happiness instead of choosing everybody else’s immediate opinion or evaluation.
If you want to start uncovering, strengthening and utilizing YOUR true authentic self proactively, if you want to start creating a fulfilling, purposeful and enjoyable lifestyle, if you want to learn how to behave with yourself and others in ways that will help you attract love, trust and appreciation, have a look at the Services and Packages I currently offer. I would be pleased to guide your process of Self-Discovery, facilitate your Self-Empowerment journey and support you on your path toward Self-Actualization.